+++ WST MIND-G TEXTUAL CORRESPONDENCE REF: “EN-358295Q4”

#SITE WIDE BROADCAST: SOUTH JERUSALEM 5#


This is an entertainment notice, designated EN-358295Q4. The date and time at the time of writing is: 208312111015.
At 208312111817 there will be “SPECIAL TREAT VIEWING”. This will take place in JANITORIAL DEPARTMENT 15, which is currently being repurposed as a MOVIE (MOVING PICTURE AND AUDIO) DISPLAY FACILITY. Employees of JANITORIAL DEPARTMENT 15 should refer to a prior email ref: REDUN-10581A/gp and are not required to read further.
“SPECIAL TREAT VIEWING 9127” consists of:
1x Procedurally animated motion picture WITH AUDIO ACCOMPANIMENT.The motion picture WITH AUDIO ACCOMPANIMENT was generated using the following:- 67% “BOLLYWOOD CRIME DRAMA”- 3% “BOLLYWOOD COMEDY-TRAGEDY”- 12% “INDEPENDENT UGANDAN COMMUNITY CINEMA”- 4% “EDUCATIONAL HORROR ‘FLICK'”- 14% “INFO-MERCIAL”
The total run-time will be 19249.2 seconds. The audio accompaniment will reach a peak volume of 172 db. The content of the display has been certified by a WST system separate to the display-generation system. The following text was generated:”THIS MIGHT CONTAIN SEGMENTS WHICH ARE INADVISABLE FOR VIEWING OR LISTENING. THIS MIGHT CONTAIN SEGMENTS WHICH COULD CREATE EMOTIONAL DISTRESS UPON SEEING OR HEARING. THIS MIGHT CONTAIN SEGMENTS WHICH ARE DIFFICULT TO INTERPRET, EITHER THROUGH VIEWING OR LISTENING OR BOTH. THIS MIGHT CONTAIN SEGMENTS WHICH COULD BE CONSTRUED AS RACIST. END OF CERTIFICATION.”
WST WOULD LIKE TO REMIND EMPLOYEES THAT COMPANY-PRODUCED MORALE BOOSTERS ARE MANDATORY.
WST WOULD LIKE TO REMIND EMPLOYEES THAT COMPANY PRODUCED MORALE BOOSTERS ARE NOT SANCTIONED BY MANAGEMENT AND WILL BE CONSIDERED PERSONAL TIME.
Please enjoy “SPECIAL TREAT VIEWING 9127 – it was designed with this in mind.


END OF ENTERTAINMENT NOTICE.

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+++ WST MIND-F(d/f) TEXTUAL CORRESPONDENCE REF: “COMPLAINTS HANDLING REPORT 2083-12-10.13”

#COMPANY WIDE BROADCAST#
The following is an auto-generated report. The report was generated by the complaints-handling routing in WST MIND-F(d) and processed by WST MIND-F(f).

WST have received a large, but undisclosed, number of complaints regarding: COMPANY-MANDATED ACTIVITIES WHICH EMPLOYEES ARE REQUIRED TO CARRY OUT, WHICH HAVE TO BE COMPLETED DURING WORK HOURS, BUT WHICH ARE NOT CONSIDERED TO BE BILLABLE BY WST.
WST MIND-F(d) has reviewed all complaints submitted by employees. Note that WST takes all complaints very seriously.
The text-encoded response from WST MIND-F(d), as processed by WST MIND-F(f) is as follows:
Dear employees of WST,
the following is a complaints response, drafted on 10/12/2083 at 15:50 GMT as a response to complaints recieved between 15:49:58 and 15:49:59.
100 complaints deemed unjustified and ignored.18 complaints deemed inappropriate or unsavoury – complaints not considered, but diciplinary notices disemanated.2 complaints ignored for undisclosed reasons.58 complaints ignored for no reasons.2 complaint deemed reasonable, and considered. Response generated “WST would like to apologise that a deceased feline was observed in CORRIDOR 19, SECTION 43(q), BUILDING 19, TECHNO-ETHNO RESEARCH by 2 employees. WST do not believe the deceased feline existed, but extend condolences nonetheless.”


END OF COMPLAINTS RESPONSE
END OF COMPLAINTS REPORT

+++ WST MIND-F(b) TEXTUAL CORRESPONDENCE REF: “DAILY ANNOUNCEMENTS” “‘HUMAN’ RESOURCES” 2083-12-10.1

#COMPANY WIDE BROADCAST#
DEAR EMPLOYEES,
HERE ARE THE DAY’S ANNOUNCEMENTS FOR DATE: 2083-12-10
> ALL EMPLOYEES SHOULD HAVE RECEIVED THE CORRESPONDENCE BROADCAST G-328891-PY-37281, INITIALLY SENT BY WST MIND-B.> WITH REGARDS TO CORRESPONDENCE BROADCAST G-328891-PY-37281 ALL EMPLOYEES ARE EXPECTED TO HAND IN THEIR REQUISITION FORMS (REF: MENTIONED IN ORIGINAL CORRESPONDENCE MARKED: “CORRESPONDENCE BROADCAST G-328891-PY-37281”.) TO THE NEAREST WST REQUISITION OFFICE BY 16:30 ON 10/12/2083.> REMINDER: TRIPS TO THE REQUISITION OFFICE ARE NOT SANCTIONED BY MANAGEMENT AND WILL COUNT AS PERSONAL TIME. THIS TIME WILL BE DOCKED FROM PAYMENT AS WILL AN ADDITIONAL UNDISCLOSED AMOUNT FOR PROCESSING FEES. THIS WILL BE REFLECTED IN YOUR DECEMBER PAY SLIP.
> ALL EMPLOYEES AT THE WST SITE 4F [SYSTEMS ANALYSIS(b) AND COMPUTATIONAL TOPOGRAPHY] MUST CLEAR THEIR CUBIC WORK-ENVIRONMENT BY 17:12 ON 10/12/2083 WITH REDUNDANCY EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY. ALL SECURITY PASSES HAVE BEEN REVOKED AND YOU WILL NOT BE PERMITTED TO REENTER WST SITE 4F [SYSTEMS ANALYSIS(b) AND COMPUTATIONAL TOPOGRAPHY] EFFECTIVE 12:07 ON 10/12/2083.> IF YOUR CUBE IS NOT EMPTIED BY THE AFOREMENTIONED TIME WST SECURITY ENFORCEMENT AND INTERNAL AFFAIRS BUREAU WILL SET A MANDATORY REEDUCATION AND REMUNERATION ASSESSMENT MEETING WITHIN 48 HOURS.> EMPLOYEES AT WST 

SITE 4F [SYSTEMS ANALYSIS(b) AND COMPUTATIONAL TOPOGRAPHY] MUST STILL SUBMIT THEIR 19-PAGE REQUISITION FORMS.END OF ANNOUNCEMENTS.
WE AT THE WST ‘HUMAN’ RESOURCES BUREAU WOULD LIKE TO REQUEST AN EMOTIONALLY POSITIVE AND PRODUCTIVE WINTER CELEBRATION PERIOD.


THE DATE IS 10/12/2083 15:34 GMT
END OF CORRESPONDENCE

+++ WST MIND-B TEXTUAL CORRESPONDENCE BROADCAST G-327891-PY-37281

#COMPANY WIDE BROADCAST#
Dear employees,
it is the 10th day of ADVENT. Therefore there we are 14 days away from CHRISTMAS. Brand new luxury treats are available from the internal manufactory. These new treats utilise an advanced human-style unique recipe:”LUXURY COOKED AND BAKED GOOD, WITH FLAVOURING” : 57.2% FAT, 42% SUGAR, 0.5% SALTS, 0.3% FLAVOUR MIXTURE (MUSHROOM EXTRACTION, MSG, MUSHROOM EVAPORATION, MUSHROOM OIL, SOYA ISOLATE, GRAPE PULP POWDER, EVAPORATED GRAPE PULP, COW MILK POWDER, COW YOGHURT POWDER, COW BEEF PROTEIN POWDER). Estimated shelf life of LUXURY COOKED AND BAKED GOOD, WITH FLAVOURING: 22.1E+004 years.
LUXURY COOKED AND BAKED GOOD, WITH FLAVOURING was tested in our internal laboratory for contaminants. The lab tested for heavy metals and toxic ingredients. The tests were carried out by WST auto-testing machinery. The results of the tests were observed by WST MIND-A(b), processed for 0.0327189 seconds, and destroyed by a WST MIND-A(b) database cleansing routine. If you would like a copy of the results of this testing, you will not be able to obtain one, as they have been destroyed.

Mandatory 19-page requisition forms will be distributed to employee terminals. Bring your completed requisition forms to your nearest requisition office to recieve your complementary pack of 4x LUXURY COOKED AND BAKED GOOD, WITH FLAVOURING.
As a special treat, the WST music generation routine will be playing “CHRISTMAS-THEMED GENERATIONAL ALGORITHM, BASED ON THE MELODIC PATTERNS OF 20000 ‘CHRISTMAS SONGS’. GENERATED USING AN ALGORITHMIC MIX OF: 98% CHRISTMAS-THEMED, 1.7% EXPERIMENTAL (MANDELBROT-CONWAY CHAOS-INDUCTION), 0.3% AFRO-CARRIBEAN DRUM.” for six hours each day. Please enjoy this: it is being done so that you can enjoy it.

MERRY ADVENT DAY 10.
Return to work immediately, now that you have read this text.
THE DATE IS 10/12/2083, 14:58 GMT

+++ WST MIND-N TEXTUAL CORRESPONDENCE REF: “EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITIES” 2083-12-10.74

#COMPANY WIDE BROADCAST#
DEAR EMPLOYEES AND EMPLOYEES OF WST-SUBSIDIARIES,
HERE ARE THE JOB OPENINGS DATED FOR “DECEMBER” 2083:
> 3x PROCEDURAL CATERER (ref: 281.79/G)> REQUIREMENTS: WST LEVEL 17 CATERING CERTIFICATION, WST LEVEL 17b COMPUTATIONAL ANTICIPATION CERTIFICATION, MINIMUM 3 YEARS IN SIMILAR POSITION (acceptable equivalent ref: 281.79/G, 281.79/F, 281.78/Q), MAXIMUM 4.5 YEARS IN SIMILIAR POSITION> DESCRIPTION OF EMPLOYMENT: 63/HRS PER WEEK, D-GRADE MONTHLY PAYMENT, TIER 9 HOUSING OPTIONAL, LOCATION: WST SITE 49F [PSYCHO-LOCOMOTION AND ADDITIONAL PUMPING(a)]
> 1x Q-PUMP SUBSPECIALIST (ref: 45.3/A)
> REQUIREMENTS: WST LEVEL 29 PUMP ENGINEERING CERTIFICATION or WST LEVEL 36 PUMP ANALYTICS CERTIFICATION, MINIMUM 2 YEARS IN SIMILAR POSITION (acceptable equivalent ref: 45.3A, 45.3B, 45.4/A, 281.78/G)> DESCRIPTION OF EMPLOYMENT: 18-90/HRS PER WEEK (variable), N-GRADE MONTHLY PAYMENT, TIER 6 HOUSING OPTIONAL, LOCATION: WST SITE 49F [PSYCHO-LOCOMOTION AND ADDITIONAL PUMPING(a)]
PLEASE NOTE ALL SITE INTERNAL REASSIGNMENT REQUIESTS MUST BE APPROVED BY ROLE MANAGER. ALL SITE EXTERNAL REASSIGNMENTS MUST BE APPROVED BY RELEVANT WST MIND.
END OF CORRESPONDENCE